Business

Defining Your Enough

How much is enough?

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This is such a loaded question, right? Enough what? Money, happiness, down time, work, etc? When we talk about enough, it doesn't always mean dollar signs, but we do need money to survive right?  Over the years, my definition of "enough" has changed from just focusing on the numbers to focusing on quality of life as well. So below I've outlined 3 simple ways to pursuing your definition of enough. 

1. Know your financial needs. Then set your number. 
In order to know how much money is enough each month, start by writing down how much you actually need to cover your basic needs (for example: mortgage, daycare, utilities, groceries, insurance, etc.) Once you know this number, you then know how many services, products, or projects you need to book each month. From there you can set your monthly financial goal. Knowing this number opens up space to pursue enough in other areas. 

2. Define your personal needs. 
What I mean by this is all the needs you have outside of your work. Your wellbeing. The things that bring joy. It could be working out, cooking, playing with your kids, going on vacation, reading, shopping, etc. The point is to write down the things that bring joy and then make intentional time for those things every week.
I use to feel immense guilt if I went to the gym for an hour while my husband was with our son. But then I realized that working out and being healthy is something that brings me joy and something that makes me a better wife and mom when I am home. My husband also knows this and therefore is supportive and encouraging when I get to have time to myself. So that time working out is not only special, it also brings me closer to living my "enough". It's a win-win. 

3. Be ok with your enough.
Once you've defined your enough including your finances and your personal needs, be intentional about being ok with that. This might be harder than the first two because it's a mental shift. It's so easy to think more = happiness. And It's ok to keep pursuing excellence and growth (in fact, you should!), but at some point, enough is enough, right? Pursuing your definition of enough = pursuing joy over the long haul. 

If you never define your enough in all aspects of life, you might find yourself never being satisfied with anything. You will always be jumping from thing to thing searching for a happiness that ultimately never happens because it will never be enough. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. How do you find your happiness? What is enough for you? 

If you never define your enough in all aspects of life, you might find yourself never being satisfied with anything.

Part Two: I Know I'm Talented, But Why Am I Not Successful?

Hey guys! Thanks for sticking with me on this little series.

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You see, the whole inspiration behind this blog series is because of a conversation I had with my husband. I was asking the question, "Why do I not feel successful?" He went on to tell me how much potential I have, how talented I am, and a bunch of other nice things. He's clearly my biggest fan ;). The problem I was wrestling with is that I know I have potential. I know I have talent. These are things I've worked really hard on. BUT, I also know that I'm not great at being patient. I get restless easily, and because I know I'm capable of juggling several things, I tend to get distracted. This brings me to the second part of this series. Persistence, Patience, and Consistency. All three of these disciplines have worked together toward success in my life.  
Call it PCP or PPC or however you want to say it, but what I've found is that when I am patient with the process, persistent when things get hard, and consistent over the long haul that is when I've experienced the most success in whatever I'm doing. Some people say "just do one thing and do it well", and while that sounds great, and for some people it is great, but for me I LIKE doing different things. I LIKE using a lot of different skills, and I LIKE multitasking. The key though for me is to remind myself in that whatever it is I'm doing I have to be patient, persistent, and consistent over the long haul in order to reach my fullest potential and to reach my definition of success. Does that make sense? 
So back to the question, "I know I'm talented, but why am I not successful?"
What I've learned are two things. First, clearly define YOUR definition of success. Not anyone else's. Then set goals to achieve that.  Second, stick to it with patience, persistence, and consistency. Pursue that thing even when it's hard and you want to throw in the towel or when you get bored and need to move on to the next thing. Trust me, I've been there and done that. 
Lastly, I know everyone is so different in their thoughts, personalities, jobs, and life. What works for me might not work for someone else. But I think this will at least start the conversation. Being honest with myself about my strengths and weaknesses has been the biggest key for growth in my career and family life. So with all of that said, if you're struggling with the idea of success in your life, maybe read part one and then part two of this series and let it simmer a little bit. I have a feeling there might be a breakthrough for you in one way or another. Cheers! 

Part One : I Know I'm Talented, But Why Am I Not Successful?

"I know I'm talented, but why am I not successful?"

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This is a statement I've run into time and time again. I've asked myself this, and I know other people have asked themselves this. People tell me I'm talented, and I know I'm talented. I know I am capable of doing a lot of different things. I'm not saying this in an arrogant way, it's just that I've worked tirelessly on my craft and skills to the point where I do feel good at them. And honestly, creative things and ideas have always come naturally for me. I know this isn't the case with everyone. So if I'm talented, gifted, or whatever you want to call it, I often found myself asking "why am I still struggling to be successful?!"

But then something shifted. I asked myself, What is success to me? To other people? I realized success means different things to different people, and I got so caught up in the comparison game that someone else's success story became my measure for success. When in fact, working 12-14 hour days, never seeing my family, hustling day and night for appearance and accolades and money wasn't my idea of success AT ALL. I've lived that life, and I don't want that life. So I started asking myself what success looked like. For me it means making enough money to live comfortably, but not lavishly. It means being done with work by 5:30pm so I can spend the evenings making a healthy dinner (and not a store bought pizza). It means having the flexibility to meet a friend for coffee on a Thursday morning. It means having a weekend free to play with my family and friends. It means doing great work that matters and doing work with clients that I am passionate about. It means working hard when I'm at work, and playing hard when I'm not. What does success look like for you? 

If we're always playing the comparison game, never defining our idea of success, I think we'll always be left also playing the "never enough" game. Never enough money, enough time, enough purpose, enough toys. The list is endless. And that road is a deep dark hole that I don't want to go down. 

So to recap the first part of this series, start by defining what success means to YOU. Not anyone else. One tip: get off of social media for a few days and really think about what success looks like in your life. Not just the amount of money you want to make, but what you want your day-to-day life to look like. By defining our individual ideas of success we can have a measurement, a goal, to reach for. And all of a sudden, it becomes enough.